von Lunmine
Sorry again for keeping you waited. I know it's no fun reading a fanfic where you have to wait ages for a new chapter.
xoxo Lunmine
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If love was a word, I don't understand
Cloe's view
I felt sad for James and his family. Al is such a nice boy. I don't understand why anyone would attack him. But without this attack my life here in England is perfect. I have lovely friends. I never thought that James would actually be so nice. I really like him. And Freddie and Drew are so sweet. To be honest: I love everyone of my new friends. I'm still missing Jane and the others and I'm still missing my mum but I've learned to live here. It's fine. School isn't too hard and Hogwarts is actually rather nice. I've changed my plans so I'm not going home for the Easter holidays. Since mum is busy with her fiancee and her unborn baby and Josh isn't my boyfriend anymore I think it will be enough when I'm coming in the summer holidays. So I'll be there for her wedding.
Drew was sitting next to me. He looked kinda curious at me. “What are you thinking about?” he asked. “About my life here. That I really enjoy Hogwarts but still miss home. And I'm not going home for Easter.” I said. “You stay here?” He asked. “No, I think I'll go home to my new family,” I said. “Ah, you don't sound happy.” He said. “I am not really. But I don't wanna stay in Hogwarts. Everyone is going home. Roxy, Freddie, James, You, Joey....” I said. “Yeah. If you want you can stay at my home, or with Roxy and Freddie or with James,” He said. “That's nice but I think I should stay with my family. Get to know them and stuff,” I said. “I'm going to Australia in the summer. My dad is the coach of Germany. Do you think we can have a great time there with you? Or are you spending all your time with your family and friends there?” He asked. “I'll spend some time with you, too. Actually I still need a date for the wedding of my mother... So when you are there and you can make it... It would be nice to have a friend there,” I smiled at him. “I'll be your date, as a friend of course. I would love to meet your family in Australia. I really like you, you know. It's great that you are here, now.”
“I'm bored, Drewiboy. Tell me how you all became friends. I still don't know that.” “Hm. You know there is the clique. We.. when we … we are all really close. Even if you don't see it from the outside. Roxy, James and Freddie were always really close. Freddie soon became one of my closest friends while James and Joey became friends. I liked Roxy and James but hated Joey. He – well sorry because he is your brother – but he was an ass. I couldn't stand him. I don't know why. So the clique as you now know wasn't like that. Freddie hang often out with me. Roxy sometimes joined. James and Joey were always together. But James was mad because Freddie didn't spend time with him so there was a huge fight in the end of our first year. It was really bloody. James and Freddie were both injured. But then they just laughed and hugged. And since then they tried to hang out with all of us. Joey and I would always fight. One day we were all in Hogsmead and some new death eaters attacked James. We all helped him and defended him. We all got hurt but Professor Longbottom and Harry Potter saved us. After that Joey and I accepted each other. Well and with time we became friends. One time I was hit by a bludger so hard that I was nearly dying. James and Freddie both were in the hospital wing, too, because they were duelling with the beater who hit the bludger. And Joey really cared for me. Since then we are real friends and everyone was happy. James and Freddie wanted to have something that confirmed our friendship so they formed the clique. Since Roxy didn't want to be the only girl, Dom became part of it, too. But one and a half year ago she stopped hanging out with us very often,” He said. “Why was Joey an ass?” I asked him curious. “He was annoying as hell. I don't really know why. I think his character and mine don't really fix. He is more … aggressive. I hate violence,” He said. Hm... Okay. “Sorry Cloe but I kinda have to use the loo.” “Well, have fun and thanks for the history lesson,” I smirked. He laughed.
I decided to get to know more about Joey. So I thought about starting with the deep stuff – like love. “Joey? Do you love your girlfriend?” I asked him without any talking around the topic. “Don't know. I like Carol a lot and I have a good time when I hang out with her but I don't know if I love her.” “Do you love Roxy?” I asked. He laughed. “You sure get to the point.” “That doesn't answer my question, dearest brother.” “Well, I was in love with her but then I kinda started that thing with Carol. I first thought I just make Roxy jealous until she realises that she loves me but somehow it didn't work and I really started to like Carol and I don't want to use her like that.” We were interrupted when James came to us.
He had a smirk on his face. “Where have you been, buddy?” I asked him. “I said my family goodbye. They are leaving now. Al is now back in his common room and Tina is there for him. Everything is fine,” He said and smiled. “And why do you have that big smirk on your face?” I asked him. He blushed. “Well, I met Lynn. We went for a walk again and well... we kissed,” He said. “So are you official dating?” asked Joey. No. Please. No. I don't know why I don't want them to date. I just know that I don't like it. Maybe because James and I are so close friends and a girlfriend won't tolerate this. Roxy will be okay because she is his cousin. But not me. I don't know. “No. We're taking things slow,” he said. He was looking at me with an odd expression. “Well, good choice. Lynn is hot and she isn't related to a clique member or in the clique,” Joey said. “Ah common. Your fucking code is shit,” I said. James looked at me surprised and Joey angry. “You don't understand the code because you're not in the clique,” He said. “And I'm proud I'm not. What if I would fall in love with eh for example James. And he would fall in love with me. And then we aren't allowed to date because of your shit code?” I said. James kinda smiled at me and blushed then. He is sometimes a bit strange. “It was only theoretical,” I said because I saw Joey confused looking to James and me. “Well. Then I would say: No. You are my sister and no offence James: but you are more like a player. My sister is not a girl for a week,” Joey said. Well that was kinda cute of him. “I'm not a player. Haven't you heard? Lynn and I are taking things slow. And I kinda have the feeling that I really like her,” James said. “Wow. So two weeks this time?” Joey asked. “Stop being an ass,” I said to Joey. “Thanks, Cloe,” James smiled at me. I must admit: he has a cute smile.
“I need Cloe” Roxy was standing in front of his. She looked shocked. What has happened? I stood up and followed her. “So?” I asked her back. “I'm in love with Joey.” she said. “Okay?”. “And Joey is in love with that stupid Carol. And Carol loves James and James loves you.” She said. “What was that about Carol, James and me?” I was confused. “Carol is in love with James. She is together with Joey to get James' attention. And James fancies you,” She said. “No, James doesn't fancy me. He's going out with Lynn.” I said. “I don't know about that. But he has to fancy you. Look at him”, She said. “How do you know?” I asked her. “He is my bloody cousin,” she said. “I still don't understand. So you love Joey, my twin?” I asked her. The thing with James confused me and I didn't believe it. “Yes,” She said. “And Joey loves Carol?” I asked her. She nodded. “Carol loves James?” I asked her again and she nodded again. “So and you say: James loves me?” I asked her. “I know that.” She said. “Well, let me tell you this: James is in love with Lynn. I heard him speaking about her and everything. Even Joey thinks he is in love with her. So what can we do about that Joey thing?” I said. She started crying. “And the worst: Joey liked me,” She said. “You know?” I asked her. “Of course. I didn't like him back... I liked Drew. But times changed since he started dating Carol again. I'm so jealous all the time,” She cried. “Wait: You liked Drew?” I was confused. “Yes.” “This is so complicated.” I said. “I know.” “What about Freddie? Who is his secret love?” “You, I think. I'm not completely sure. But I think it's you.” “No way. Freddie isn't in love with me.” “Oh yes, he is.” “Damn. Why does everything has to be so complicated,” I said. She nodded. “I don't understand this stupid love. Why can't Joey just like me back. Drew gets Carol, Freddie you and James Lynn.” She said. “I don't wanna go out with Freddie.” I said. “Well, then Freddie and Lynn and you and James,” she said. “No. I don't wanna go out with James either.” “Who is you secret crush then?” “Nobody. I just got over Josh. I don't wanna have a boy right now,” I said. “Really? Your life must be easy.” She seemed a bit jealous. “Well, besides I'm in a different country with a strange English. Sometimes people say something to me and I think: Eh What? But I just smile and nodd. And then my mum. She is marrying this bloke and she's having a baby. And how did she tell me? Oh yes by the way: i'm having a baby. My life is so easy,” I said a bit angry. Even if I'm starting to like my new life doesn't mean that it isn't easy. I'm still crying at night about my home. I miss everything like hell.
“Sorry. I didn't mean it that way. I just... my love life and everything,” She seemed sorry. “I know. I overreacted. But I'm still not sure if it's the right decision not to go home for the Easter Holidays. But otherwise: Once I'm there it will be much harder to go back,” I said. “But in the summer you are going there, too?” She was confused. I haven't talked much about me missing home. I didn't want to. I thought it's kinda rude when you have so nice friends and you keep moaning about your friends back home. “Well, you are all coming there. So it won't be me alone there,” I said. “Yeah, you're right.” She said. “So. How can I get Joey?” She asked me. “First of all you need to get rid of that damn code,” I said. She nodded. “Then we need Joey to break up with Carol – which is kinda mean – and after that we need him to fall in love with you again – which should be easy, because I think you are easy to love,” I said. “Sounds complicated. And I don't want to break Carol and Joey up. I want him to break up with her and without someone telling him to or doing it for him.” “Then we only got one option,” I said. She looked at me curious. “Waiting.” “That sucks.” “Yep.”
I was looking for an easy and relaxing evening and that's why I started looking for Drew. With Drew everything was easy. I found Drew outside. He was sitting on a bench under a tree. “Hey mate,” I said to him smiling. “Hey Aussie,” was the answer. “What's up?” I asked him. “Not much. Just wanted some time to think,” He said. “Do you want me to go?” I asked him. “No, I like your company.” “What were you thinking about?” I asked him. “About us, the clique, how everything will change when you go back to Australia,” He said. “What do you mean?” “I'm not blind, Cloe. I see what's going on. I know you miss Australia, your family, your friends. I know you want to go back. Even though you broke up with Josh and your mum wasn't the nicest.” “You are a smart guy,” I simply said. “I also know that Freddie fancies you, I thought James fancied you as well, but since he started going out with Lynn, I'm not too sure anymore. I know Roxy fancies Joey, but Joey loves Carol and Carol is in love with James. So I know how screwed up our friendship is. Because no one talks to each other about stuff like that.” “You are talking to me about that,” I said. He nodded. “But I'm not talking about me or my love or something like that. Because I am scared to make myself vulnerable,” He said. “Understandable. But sometimes it helps to talk to people. Sometimes it makes things easier,” I said. “Don't want to talk about it. Maybe we could just like go flying?” He asked. I nodded. If that's what he wants. A bit sad that my supposed to be easy evening was gone I followed him.
It was fun flying with Drew. When it was time for dinner we both walked in the Great Hall. Roxy was sitting next to James and Freddie. Joey was with his girlfriend at the Hufflepuff table. “Where do you wanna sit?” I asked him. “Let's go to our friends. No need to spread rumours by sitting alone,” Drew answered smirking. I laughed.
“Where have you been all day?” Freddie asked us curious. “Outside,” I answered. “What were you doing? Are you secretly dating?” Freddie asked. “No, we were flying around and having fun,” Drew answered. “So what are you doing tonight?” Freddie asked us. “We were thinking about watching a movie,” Drew said. “Ahh, can I join you, please?” He asked. Drew looked at me. “I don't mind. If you don't care?” I asked him. He shook his head. “Sure. After dinner in our dorm.” “Ah, I'd love to join you as well but I have a date with Lynn,” James said. “What are your plans for the evening?” Freddie asked Roxy. “I have to do homework and study,” She said. “Sounds exciting.” Freddie said. “Tomorrow is the first training day, isn't it?” I asked James. “Nah, it's not the first. But the first for me as captain. I'm a bit nervous to be honest. Maybe I'm a shit captain.” “No you aren't. You are an awesome captain,” I said. “How would you know?” “You're Gryffindor captain.” “Well, yes. I don't wanna sound big headed but it's a difference. Gryffindor is kinda... well... it's just different, okay?” He sounded annoyed. I decided that it would be best not to talk to him.
Camille and Sharon were coming to us. “Cloeany? We want to talk to you.” Damn this bitches. I'm Cloe. I hate Cloeany. “Eh, about what?” “In private, please,” Camille said. “Eh, sure,” I said. “Do you have a thing with Drew? We saw you today outside,” Camille asked. Aha. I remember Roxy telling me that Camille has a thing for Drew. “Well, no,” I said. “Why were you hanging out with him then? Just the two of you. Sitting on a bench. Sounds for me like romance,” Sharon asked. “Why are you bitching around? When I wanna hang out with a friend then I do it. And it's none of your business. You aren't even friends with Drew.” “He'll be the father of my kids. So it is my business.” “But Drew doesn't love bitches like you. So just stay out of his life and mine.” “You are such a bitch. You want everyone of the clique for yourself. First you had a thing with James, now you have a thing with Drew. Let me guess: tomorrow it will be Freddie and the day after tomorrow Joey?” “Joey is my fucking twin. And FYI: I am not in love with any member of the clique.” “Ouch. That hurts, Aussie,” Freddie was here. “Ha. Do you see? You don't even recognise that you are breaking their hearts.” “Freddie, you wombat. What are you doing here?” “I heard someone scream bitch and fucking and thought that this might be funny. So what's going on here?” “Those bitches think of you as their best friends and I'm having a thing with everyone of you. Even with Joey.” “Gross, Cloe. Joey? Really? That is forbidden!” “It's not funny!” I said to him. “Well, Camille, Sharon: No one of the clique is friends with you. So don't even think about asking Cloe about her or our love life. That is private. Get a life and stop behaving like bitches. Cloe, we go. We have a date with Drew. And FYI: we are meeting us in our dorm to have fun with Cloe if you understand what I'm trying to tell you.”
“Freddie, you are hilarious,” I said still laughing. I will always remember the odd impressions on the face of the two bitches (it's how we now call them) after Freddie told them about the threesomes. “You know that it will be the topic in the whole school for the next months,” I said. “Kinda cool. Everyone will think that we three are so hot that we can even have a threesome.” “Wah. Even the thought of that is iiilb.” “Ah honey. I'm hot you can't deny that,” Freddie laughed. “You're getting less hot with every word you say.” Freddie laughed. “You really are one of a kind, Aussie,” Freddie smiled. I thought about what Roxy told me earlier. Was it possible that Freddie really fancied me? Or James. No I don't think James. He looks like he really has a thing with Lynn.
“So, we do have a threesomes?” Drew laughed. I nodded and Freddie grinned. “You are a genius. Now the whole school will think I'm a slut,” I said. “Ah, they already do.” Drew laughed. “Not funny. You can have a guys night any second,” I said to him. “No honey, don't leave. Please,” Freddie said. I laughed. We watched a horror movie. Something like I know what you did last summer. It was actually funny. Drew thought I was crazy because I laughed nearly the whole time. “Do you wanna stay with us over night? We could watch another movie,” Drew suggested. “Ehh, sure,” I said and thought about the rumours Sharon and Camille could spread if they knew. “You wanna have a t-shirt and boxers?” Freddie offered. “Would be great,” I answered. We were lying in Freddies bed and watched another horror movie. Eventually I fall asleep.
“Where have you been all night?” Roxy asked me. “We watched another movie and I fell asleep. Sorry,” I said to her. “It's fine. I just was a bit worried after what happened to Al,” Roxy looked at me. “James kissed Lynn.” Okay. Nice. Why does this concern me? “I'm happy if he finds that girl for him. I just hope she doesn't see his fame or only his fame,” I said. “Did you have problems like that back in Australia?” She asked me. I nodded. Yeah. Many Muggles wanted to be friends with me and many boys. “It's hard to know if someone likes you for your character or for your parents...” I said. “Hm. I think we all have something like that. You know: Every Weasley. But the Potters have it worse. Especially James,” Roxy said. “He seems so worried the whole time,” I said. “No wonder. What happened to Al isn't a great thing. And maybe he is afraid that something like that will happen to him?” Roxy said. Hm. Yeah... I haven't talked to him much lately. I miss him. He was such a good friend to me...
“Good morning, boys,” I said. It was a Saturday and Roxy and I just came down for breakfast. James was sitting there with Lynn. Also Freddie, Joey, Carol and Drew were there. “Since all my friends are finally here: Lynn is my girlfriend,” James said. Weirdly, he was looking at me. “Congrats, dude,” I said to him. “I hope you treat James well, he is a nice guy,” I said to Lynn, she smiled, “I know.” Everyone congratulated them. James didn't seem that happy. I am sure I looked happier with Josh. Josh... I miss him. I really miss him. Gosh. I shouldn't miss him. But I do. I was happy with him. I really was. How could he do that to me? I... Ahh.. I need to go outside. I walked outside. When I reached the lake I sat down and cried. Gosh. I am like a baby. But I can't believe what Josh did to me or tried to do. I … ahhh. Why do I still miss him?
“Is everything alright, Cloe?” James appeared next to me. “Sure,” I answered. “Not convinced,” He said and smiled. “I... I don't understand... When I saw you with Lynn... I thought about Josh and I realised that I still miss that git...” I said. He didn't know what to say. “Maybe you are not missing him but missing having a boyfriend?” He asked after a while. “No, I miss the way he smiled at me. I miss that he always made me laugh. I miss that he always knew what to say and I miss him saying 'I love you'. And I miss him being around me. I miss the old Josh. The Josh that never got jealous. The Josh that always was there for me and never wanted to hurt me... I miss my Joshi...” I said. “I understand. A break up is hard. And maybe you miss the old Josh. But he isn't the same person anymore and believe me: you deserve much better than him,” He said. “I know... But it hurts. It hurts that the person I loved has changed so much...” He hugged me. “Where is Lynn?” I asked him. “I said I needed to look after you alone. I was unsure. Maybe you were upset about me being together with Lynn....” “What if I was? Would you have broken up with her?” “I am not sure. I don't love her. I like her. And between loving someone and liking someone is a big difference.” “So why is she your girlfriend?” “She is someone I could love. But I don't know her well enough to love...” He said but looked away. Hm.. Well: Definitely: He doesn't fancy me. “Do you fancy her?” I asked him. “Of course,” was his answer. “We should go back,” I said. He nodded.
The next weeks nothing really happened. School was boring, my friends were fun. James was always with Lynn. Sometimes they were with us, sometimes they were with her friends. Well, and James of course had a lot of training with Gryffindor and with the Cup and his team. I also knew that he was searching for a manager. It was one of the few moments when he was with us without Lynn. “Freddie?” He asked his best mate. “What's up?” Freddie answered. “You wanna be my manager?” He asked. “Ehh... WHAT?!” Was his answer. Couldn't blame him. “I don't want some boring manager. I want someone who gets me and who knows me,” he said. “But I have no idea about being a manager and what a manager should do...” Freddie said. “Sooo? You could learn. Okay anyone from you guys wanna be my manager. You get paid!” “I'm in! I will learn everything. I will even owl dad,” Freddie said. James laughed. “Thanks, mate.” He said. “So.. I think we should make a contract,” James said. Freddie and James went up to their dorm.
“Hey Aussie, holidays are soon,” Drew said to me. “I know?” I said. “It would be cool if you would come visit me.” Drew said. “Yeah... But I've told you. I should spend time with my new family.” “Oh common. We are the people you live with. You see them two weeks!” Drew said. “And that is the point! But if I ask you could always visit us, I guess.” I suggested. “Yeah mate, stay with us!” Joey said. “Nah, I promised dad that I'd come home. Sorry. But I'd love to,” He said. “Okay, no worries,” I said. “But I visit you!” Drew said. I smiled. “Lynn is staying with James over the holidays, isn't she?” Roxy asked us. Roxy was annoyed of Lynn. I felt with her. Lynn is annoying. She never leaves James. I mean it's nice that she loves him but we are his friends. He is like my brother. Why the hell am I not allowed to spend time with him anymore? I miss him a lot. He is so lovely. He is such a cool friend and always fun. “No, I don't think that James asked her,” Drew said. “Why?” I asked him. “Because he never brings girls home. Never,” Drew said. Hm... I was at his home and so was Roxy? “You don't count. Roxy is his cousin and you are the twin of his best mate Joey.” Drew said. Was he a mind-reader? “No I didn't read your mind.” Drew laughed. HELP! “Your face is obvious. Nobody needs to mind read if he looks in your face, Aussie,” Drew laughed. Git. Okay. Maybe it is obvious. “I can never thank you all enough for being so nice to me. You really help me finding my place in England,” I said to Drew and Joey. They smiled. “That's what friends are supposed to do.”
Soon the Easter Holidays were on. The Clique and I sat in one compartment. It was really funny. Even Dom joined us. So yes, the compartment was a bit small for seven people but we had a great time. “You have to visit me, Cloe,” Roxy said. I nodded. “Yeah and you have to visit me,” I said to her. “I'm sure we will meet at the Easter Day at Grannys,” Dom smiled. “What is the Easter Day?” I asked. “It's one day in the holidays. It's not the normal Easter day. It's always the Wednesday and the whole family comes to the Burrow and we are having breakfast, lunch and dinner there. Everyone is allowed to bring one friend. James is always bringing Joey, Freddie Drew, well and this year I'll bring you with me unless you don't want,” Roxy smiled. “Sounds amazing. So, what do I have to wear?” I asked her and the others laughed. “Something nice but not too formal. Most of the time we are eating,” Freddie laughed. “Roxy?” I asked her. “Like Freddie said. A nice dress but not a glamours dress but a nice one or a skirt or nice blouse. Whatever. Just don't come in your jogging suit,” Roxy grinned. “Okay. I think I'll manage that,” I smiled. “It's gonna be great. And since you live that near to James we can all hang out a lot,” Roxy smiled and hugged me a bit from the side.
We were all in our compartment on the train ride home. Of course Lynn is with us. I don't want to sound annoyed but she is annoying. They are kissing the whole time.. Well, you could call it snogging. Roxy and I were reading a gossip magazine. Of course there was a large article about James. “It's an old one,” Roxy said to me. “Why?” I asked. “It says James is still single,” Roxy answered. “Nah, it isn't that official with Lynn and me,” James answered and stopped snogging her. “Well, official enough that the whole school knows it. So I bet next week everyone will know her,” I answered. James looked a bit annoyed. “Yeah, maybe,” Why was he annoyed at that fact? Shouldn't he want to tell the world? He looked to Lynn. She smiled at him. “I'm going to miss you so much, James. Sure you don't have time?” She asked him. “I'll see what I can do. But my training schedule is hard and I think after one day I'll be dead and happy to go to bed. I have on free day which is the Easter Day of Granny where my whole family will be together. I'm really sorry, Lynn.” “It's fine. I just enjoyed the last days with you way too much.” She put her head on his shoulder. I don't know why but I think I don't like Lynn much. Well. Actually, lately an idea came into my mind. What if I have a little crush on James? Just a little one. Last night I even dreamed of him. Weird. “So, Roxy. Do you wanna go shopping on Monday?” I asked her. She nodded. “I'm in too, if you don't mind.” Dom said. “Of course we don't. You are more than welcome,” I smiled at her. I liked Dom even though I didn't know her as well as the others but she was always friendly and nice. “Can we meet us somewhere and grab some drinks or have lunch or dinner or something like that?” Freddie asked. “Sure. You in Drew?” “Absolutely,” He grinned. “You of course could come, too,” I said to James. “But I know you have training.” “Yeah, I'm afraid. Otherwise I'd be in,” He smiled. “I'm going to see my friends, ok?” Lynn looked to James. “Of course. I'll come after you later, ok?” She nodded and kissed him goodbye.
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